Mark Linskey, aside from fronting the Hudson Falcons, driving the van, and scoping out cheap deals for hotels, also spends a lot of time being an all-around swell guy. So, when we had a little bit of time on Day 3, he decided to drive in the opposite direction so that I could have the chance to see Cleveland and, in particular, the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Really, you should buy all the Falcons CDs just because of that. Lucky for you, the CDs are also good enough to stand on their own. C'mon, what are you waiting for? Do it now. Buy "La Famiglia" first.
So ends the commercial interruption for this post. I can't promise there won't be more in future posts.
Anyway, the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, situated just off Lake Erie (my first Great Lake), doesn't quite measure up to either the Baseball or the Country Music Hall of Fame, but it aint that bad. I was glad to be there during the Roy Orbison exhibition, although it was a little too heavy on the late-'80s comeback for my taste. Still, it was a room full of Roy Orbison memorabilia, so I was happy. The Rick Nelson exhibit? A little less enjoyable.
I'm also of the opinion that a Hall of Fame needs plaques, and the Rock and Roll Hall doesn't deliver. Instead, there are signatures etched into a wall, which is far less impressive (although, as an autograph collector, it was fun to count the ones I had...yes, I'm a nerd). Aside from the wall of signatures, the actual inductee hall was largely taken up by a theater that showed clips of the inductees. Multimedia presentations in halls of fame are only allowed in Cooperstown's Grandstand Theatre. Everybody else should stop trying.
The Ramones display had some pretty cool stuff, including a setlist in which all the stage movements ("Take off jackets") and even the "1234"s were written out. Also, it appears that Marky Ramone is willing to give and sign just about everything he has, as his stuff was all over tha place. Good for him.
So, yeah, it was cool to see the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame (especially since it didn't cost a thing...bands get in free with a CD or tour laminate...shhhhh), and it was nice to actually do something during daylight hours other than sit in a van. Thanks, Mark.
The guys in the Falcons and I also had to make one more stop in Medina, on the way to Columbus. Some people were waiting to hear us speak.
Yessir, chick masters, every last one of us.
Even with the trip to Cleveland, we still pulled into Columbus early enough to make a guitar string run at Sam Ash and check into the Hotel of the Week, the Quality Inn and Suites. The guys and gal from Maybe Pete met us there, after spending the earlier part of the day bowling. Luckily, I didn't know they were doing that, otherwise I would have been faced with the Sophie's Choice of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame or bowling. I'm not sure I could have handled that. The fact that I hadn't packed my ball and shoes would have made it only slightly easier.
Anyway, the Quality Inn had a courtyard and everything, with couches in the hallways. Pretty swank (and cheap). And there was enough time between check-in and the show at Bernie's Distillery to call a Tinsel and Rot reader with birthday wishes. At Tinsel and Rot, we care about the fanbase.
But soon it was off to Bernie's, where Mark was hoping for a good Thursday night crowd after a couple of rough turnouts for the first three gigs. When we pulled up, Bocephus's "Whiskey Bent and Hell Bound" was blasting out in the street. That should have been a good sign. But it wasn't.
Bernie's Distillery is in a part of Columbus with a decent flow of people. Unfortunately, more of them seemed interested in frequenting the bright, generic college bar down the street than the dank basement at Bernie's. Kids today. Oh well, screw them. And screw you if you'd rather get drunk with a bunch of preppy douchebags in a loud, obnoxious bar than go see live music. You're a waste. But thanks for reading!
After loading in everything (and extending my streak of days hitting my head on the trailer to three), I took a little walk around Columbus, stopping for a blueberry cake and a buttermilk doughnut at Buckeye Donuts. You don't realize how much you miss an honest-to-goodness independent doughnut shop until you step inside one. Dunkin' Donuts is fine, but there's something about a real doughnut shop that totally kicks ass. Or maybe I'm just weird.
When I got back to Bernie's, the opening band was wrapping up, and the crowd was just about as thin as when I'd left. But there were two interesting people added to the mix. One was a guy I dubbed The Ghost of George Clinton Future. I should have snapped a picture. But I was afraid he might kill me. So you'll just have to imagine.
The other newcomer was a guy I had seen during my doughnut run, and I wouldn't have expected him to be at a rock show. Then I remembered Mark and Doyle talking about "Batman," a guy who's been to all of their shows and always requests the theme to the "Batman" TV show. This, I realized, was the guy. "Viva La Bam" devotees might say he was a slimmer, slightly more understandable version of Don Vito.
As the veteran on the tour, Mark had told Frankie and Kelly that they would be playing "Batman" tonight. So they played it at the beginning of their set, but by the time they wrapped it up, Batman hadn't come up to the stage. So they had to start it again. This time, he joined in or, more accurately, he just stepped up to the mike and sang "Nananananananananananananananana" and "Batman" a lot.
Not satisfied with that, he asked for "Batman" again during the Falcons' set. And so it was Round 2 (technically, 3) of the theme from "Batman." You figure he'd be satisfied. You'd be wrong. Now he wanted to sing "Hang On Sloopy." Mark promised he'd play it later, and from a lot of bands that would just be a vow meant to silence a guy. But not the Falcons. And so those few and righteous music lovers who came to Bernie's got to hear Mark sing the verses while Batman would come in and howl, "Slooooooooooooopy" during the chorus. Words can't properly explain it. A picture can't either, but why don't we try?
Amazingly, the Falcons were able to use "Sloooooooooooopy" to propel the show forward, with the night again ending on a high note as Frankie came up on stage to play. And with so much room in front of the stage, I was able to get up close for some pictures. Mark was even kind enough to pose for one in the middle of a guitar solo.
Good times.
Yesterday's Youth closed the show, and they won the prize as Hardcore Band of the Week. I respect anybody who gets up on stage and performs, but hardcore generally wears on me pretty quick. Yesterday's Youth actually held my attention and sounded pretty good. I didn't think of going back to Buckeye Donuts once during their set. Nice work, boys.
After the show, the rock and roll caravan moved on to the Waffle House, located just down the road from the jello wrestling and right next door to the elegant Danny's Gold Fox strip club, both of which were closed up by the time we got back. A real shame.
Our Waffle House waitress apparently was involved in a freak accident that left her incapable of delivering any facial expression, but the chocolate chip waffles tasted damn good. If it's not obvious by now, I will forgive anything so long as pancakes, waffles, and french toast are nearby. That's just how I roll.
After the Waffle House, Drew and I entertained ourselves by reciting lines from "Adventures in Babysitting" (if "nobody leaves this stage without singing the blues" and "I don't have a weiner" mean nothing to you, your life has been poorly lived). So, in one day (or one twenty-four-hour span, to be precise), you had the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, actual rock and roll, good doughnuts, a visit to the Waffle House, and talk of "Adventures in Babysitting."
Helluva day.
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