Soundtrack Songs I Have Loved

You might think I spent all of my youth buying soundtracks. This is completely and utterly wrong. You're clearly not as smart as you think you are, with your fancy book learning and alleged keen insight into what I spent money on when I was younger.

I will have you know, Mister or Miss Smartypants (Mrs. Smartypants if you married into the Smartypants clan) that I very often bought 45s of songs that were on soundtracks. And sometimes I bought these 45s without ever seeing, or having any real intention to see, the movies in which they appeared. See, just when you think you have all the answers, I change the questions (thank you, Rowdy Roddy Piper, star of Body Slam, whose soundtrack I, of course, have).

In any event, now that we've pointed out how stupid you are, let's look at some of the great soundtrack songs I own on 45s.



Who can forget the brilliant acting career of Olympic gymnast Mitch Gaylord? Or the amazing solo career of Duran Duran's Andy Taylor? Or the days when Wayne Gretzky's wife was a motion picture lead? What's that? Everyone, you say? Well, then let's all go back to those thrilling times and enjoy Andy Taylor's "Take It Easy," from the Gaylord/Jones vehicle American Anthem.



I cannot begin to tell you what compelled me to buy this 45 (it almost certainly wasn't the video). I can only guess that my sister's slavish devotion to Duran Duran (though she was more of a John Taylor gal) finally rubbed off on me. And I can't decide if that video makes me glad or sad that I've never seen American Anthem. That Mitch Gaylord seems like one hell of an actor.



Did you know that Bob Seger's "Shakedown" (from Beverly Hills Cop II) was nominated for an Academy Award in 1987? And that somehow it didn't win? It lost to "(I've Had) The Time of My Life," which I guess I can understand. If it had lost to fellow nominee "Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now," that would've been a problem.



Fun fact: I still get a little excited when that song comes on the radio (i.e., twice a year).


Wikipedia tells me that Little Richard performed "Shakedown" at the Academy Awards that year, which enables me to make a nice segway into Mr. Penniman's "Great Gosh A' Mighty" from Down and Out in Beverly Hills, a movie I clearly remember falling asleep in the middle of after I rented it from the late, lamented Electronic Junction in Staten Island, NY. Oh well. The song's still good.



To be fair, the movie might be good. I get the impression it's not a film that a 10-year-old would find uproarious. For instance, neither Bobcat Goldthwait nor John Candy were in it. They were, though, both in Hot to Trot, whose soundtrack I have nothing to say about (if there even was one). And I probably shouldn't bring up that I did think that movie was funny when I was a kid. I'm gonna go ahead and guess that it's less funny than I remember. I will look for it on Turner Classic Movies and get back to you.



If memory serves, Innerspace was the first movie I saw at the sprawling UA movie multiplex in Staten Island. And, unlike, Hot to Trot, I think it holds up pretty well. Martin Short's great, Dennis Quaid is right in the heart of his cool period, and Robert Picardo's Cowboy was awesome (I will sometimes involuntarily break out into "I'm an Old Cowhand (from the Rio Grande)" just because of his rendition). Screw it, let's watch that before we get to the song.



Rod Stewart's cover of Sam Cooke's "Twistin' the Night Away" is just about as good as that, though, and one of the last cool things Rod Stewart ever did (there were a few more decent years after this, and "Forever Young" was my grammar school graduation song, so I've got a soft spot for that).




Innerspace was about as trippy as my young mind could handle, so there is absolutely no way that I would have had any interest in seeing Less Than Zero (and when I finally did get around to seeing it, I wound up being not that much more interested). So that might partially explain why I didn't buy the 45 of the Bangles' excellent cover (which I doubt I knew at the time) of "Hazy Shade of Winter." We were given a large dose (pun intended) of antidrug lectures in school, so I might've thought twice about buying a 45 from a druggie movie. But I eventually picked up the 45 a decade or so later. It stands as not only one of the better soundtrack songs ever, but also one of the best covers.



Speaking of buying soundtrack songs well after the fact, there is another category of Soundtracks I Have Loved and that is Soundtracks I Have Bought in My 20s and 30s Because I Loved One Song on Them and, Hey, This Record's Cheap, So I'm Gonna Buy It. So, let's look at those before we wrap this whole thing up (don't be sad).


I know what you're thinking. (Did you ever notice I know what you're thinking a lot? Either you are totally transparent and/or feeble-minded or I'm some sort of dark genius who can peer into the minds of all those around him. You choose the one that makes you more comfortable.) How can you have a series about great soundtracks and not properly salute the Almighty Lord of Soundtracks, Mr. Kenny Loggins? Well, you can't. And that is why I salute the first and greatest of the Loggins soundtrack oeuvre, "I'm Alright" from Caddyshack.



There is nothing bad about that song. Nothing. Now, should Mr. Loggins have accepted the invitation to repeat the magic for Caddyshack II? Probably not. But I still lie awake at night sometimes and think about how that movie got made, so I think there may have been some sort of black magic involved in that whole production.


Because I am a heartless ogre, Disney movies have never done much for me. There are a few exceptions, though, and of that bunch my favorite is the often-overlooked Oliver & Company, which, due to its utilization of the vocal skills of Huey Lewis and Billy Joel on the soundtrack, was right up my young alley (though I was a bit old for the movie when it came out). Mr. Joel voiced Dodger, my favorite character (I think we still have the McDonald's Christmas ornament), and sang my favorite song in the movie.




When it comes to the greatest soundtrack songs of all time, there is a healthy amount of competition, as you have seen and heard if you have followed along here. So, what's the best? It's a near-impossible question for me to answer, so thanks a lot for asking it, jerk. And you know what? I'm not giving you a definitive answer. So there.

But if you're compiling a Top 10 (are you? Are you stealing my idea? That's so like you), there's no way you can leave out Lindsay Buckingham's "Holiday Road" from National Lampoon's Vacation. It's a classic song from a classic movie. The video, which I'd never seen before, is odd, though.




And while you're compiling that Top 10 (could you at least give me a shoutout or something? I think I deserve that much), you may want to look at the soundtrack of one of the greatest cinematic achievements this or any other country has put forth. I am, of course, speaking of the Fat Boys' bravura performance in Disorderlies. Incredibly, they were able to take time off from acting in the film to record one of my all-time favorite soundtrack cuts, an ostensible cover of "Baby, You're A Rich Man" that puts the Beatles to shame.



See what I mean? The Human Beat Box's sword solo is incredible, no?

Well, that's all I have on soundtracks. Actually, it probably isn't. But this can't go on forever, so let's end the series here.

Thanks for reading, and I'll see you at the movie soundtrack section of your local record store.

Soundtracks I Have Loved: Back to the Beach

Soundtrack: Back to the Beach
Year Released: 1987
I Bought It On: Cassette, then vinyl
How Does It Hold Up?: Still my favorite soundtrack of all time

SIDE ONE
1. Catch a Ride--Eddie Money
2. Pipeline--Stevie Ray Vaughan & Dick Dale
3. Sign of Love--Aimee Mann
4. Absolute Perfection--Private Domain (special appearance by Pato Banton)
5. Surfin' Bird--Pee-wee Herman
SIDE TWO
6. Sun, Sun, Sun, Sun, Sun--Marti Jones
7. Jamaica Ska--Annette Funicello & Fishbone
8. Wipe Out--Herbie Hancock (special appearances by Dweezil Zappa and Terry Bozzio)
9. California Sun--Frankie Avalon
10. Wooly Bully--Dave Edmunds

These were many reasons fighting hard against me wanting to see Back to the Beach in the summer of 1987. I was not--and am not--a beach person, likely because of the sunburn I got on my feet at the Jersey Shore when I was a wee lad. Also, I had never seen—or had any desire to see—one of the Frankie and Annette beach movies, and I'm pretty sure I didn't even know who Frankie Avalon was (though Skippy was my peanut butter of choice--I had a peanut butter sandwich for lunch roughly 99% of my eight years in grammar school...I was not a very adventurous eater--so I was fond of Annette.

But there were only so many things you could do when you were 10 years old and living on Staten Island in the summer of 1987. And that short list of fun was topped by the UA movie theater in Travis, which opened to much fanfare in 1987 (I think...feel free to correct me Staten Island cinema historians) as the island’s first significant multiplex (there were a few theaters with multiple screens but none with the double-digit count of the UA). Before the UA, we would have to go all the way to the Amboy Multiplex Cinemas in Sayreville, NJ, which was fine, because that meant we would go to Razzmatazz, too. There was no Razz-Ma-Tazz near the UA in Travis, just the Fresh Kills landfill, which was within close smelling distance, as was also the case with the other Great Beacon of Fun, the Staten Island Mall.

The opening of the UA theater, which was also the first movie theater that was really close to “our side” of the island, ushered in the brief period of my life where movies were an important part of my life (I have probably seen as many movies in the theater in the last two decades as I saw from 1987–1990). And there wasn’t a whole lot of discrimination in my theatrical choices. The basic formula was if it’s a comedy and it’s not rated R, well, sure, I’ll go see it.

And, so, this is how I wound up at the UA theater in the summer of 1987 (I think with Donnie Daszkowski) asking the ticket seller for one to Back to the Beach.

As a testament to how little there was to do on a Friday night on Staten Island in 1987, the screening was nearly sold out. We were told the only seats were in the first few rows, so maybe we’d want to go see another movie. Whether it was a lack of viable options or just a dogged determination to see five minutes of Pee-wee Herman (a possible selling point, though I was never a rabid Pee-wee fan) I do not recall, but we decided to persevere and wound up watching Back to the Beach from, I think, the second row.

I still do not regret that decision. I liked the movie (it's so ridiculously over the top and kitschy that I'm surprised there isn't a statue dedicated to it in Williamsburg). And I loved the soundtrack. Make that love the soundtrack. In fact, it might be my favorite soundtrack of all time. Let me tell you about it.

It starts off on such a gloriously incongruous note that it simply can't miss. In his boldest feat since suggesting that paradise somehow involved being in close quarters with him, Eddie Money beckons the listener to join him for some surfing. Because there is no person who better personifies surfing than the pasty, slightly haggard Mr. Money. Whatever. It works.



Then comes a truly glorious moment in the history of soundtracks: a cover of "Pipeline" by Dick Dale and Stevie Ray Vaughan. Again, Stevie Ray's not exactly the poster boy for sun and fun, but getting him and the King of the Surf Guitar together is a legitimate coup for the soundtrack. I hope whoever came up with this idea was handsomely rewarded. And whoever styled Dick Dale's hair deserves similar props. And partial blame for the hole in the ozone layer.



The soundtrack continues the theme of showcasing the talents of those who probably don't tan very well by including another in the long line of aurally pleasing Aimee Mann songs, "Sign of Love." Criminally, there is no record of this on YouTube, so you will have to take my word for it. Or come over to my place for a Back to the Beach party. You can have your choice of hearing the song on cassette or vinyl. And I'll hang up my Back to the Beach poster for the occasion.

I'm not sure I feel comfortable saying there's a bad track on the album, but Private Domain's "Absolute Perfection" is the closest thing to a weak link (and now that I see what they look like, I'm a little more comfortable). But any bad vibes are quickly erased by another moment of soundtrack genius: Pee-wee Herman's cover of "Surfin' Bird," which I once owned the 45 of. Alas, I stepped on it in my messy room and broke it. I've never really forgiven myself. But getting Pee Wee to sign the soundtrack softened the blow a bit.



Side Two starts off slowly with Marti Jones's catchy if not entirely memorable "Sun, Sun, Sun, Sun, Sun" (another no-YouTube cut) but then amps up the bizarre quotient of Side One by finally bringing together Annette Funicello and Fishbone. Yes, that's right. This was probably my favorite track in my youth, and I still have a hard time not singing it for hours after hearing it (and if you prefer your Jamaica ska with a little less kitsch, try this).



And there's another slightly less bizarre (and not quite as successful to my ears) collaboration next, this one between Dweezil Zappa, Terry Bozzio, and Herbie Hancock on "Wipe Out." It's perfectly acceptable, but as far as "Wipe Out" covers go, there's the Fat Boys and Beach Boys' cover and then there's everybody else. But, good try, fellas.



"California Sun" is one of my all-time favorite songs, and I remember playing the original (on a cassette I bought at either Jamesway or Ames) and the Frankie Avalon cover here an awful lot, despite the fact that I didn't actually see the California sun until I was in my 30s. But as soon as I booked that flight, that became the song in my head for several months. The Frankie Avalon cover gets bonus points for giving Dick Dale more work on the soundtrack. And more hair time.



YouTube, which apparently hates Back to the Beach, does not have a clip of Dave Edmunds' "Wooly Bully" cover, but if you know the song and you know Dave Edmunds, you probably know it's plenty good without having to hear it. I am a little disappointed that he wasn't given a collaborator on the track, though. I think one of the many people who did cameos in the movie (Don Adams, Bob Denver, Alan Hale Jr., Tony Dow, Barbara Billingsley, and Jerry Mathers) would have been good choices, but it's easy to say so in hindsight.

There are two songs in the movie that inexplicably don't make it to the soundtrack. Well, maybe the first one's explicable. Without the visual component of Lori Loughlin, "Pajama Party" is something I'd be comfortable never hearing again. But there's no good reason (other than thinking that the song is so cloying that it should be kept far, far away from the soundtrack) why the album couldn't end with "Some Things Live Forever."



But I'm willing to forgive this oversight, because even without the tune, this is still my favorite soundtrack of all time (Cocktail and La Bamba are [guitar]neck and [bottle]neck for #2)). And I might never have bought it if I hadn't made that decision to go out on opening night and see it from the second row, probably because I had nothing better to do. Thanks, Staten Island. You raised me well.

Soundtracks I Have Loved: Pulp Fiction

Soundtrack: Pulp Fiction
Year Released: 1994
I Bought It On: CD
How Does It Hold Up?: Well

1. Pumpkin and Honey Bunny (dialogue)/Misirlou - Dick Dale & His Del-Tones
2. Royale With Cheese (dialogue) - John Travolta and Samuel L. Jackson
3. Jungle Boogie - Kool & The Gang
4. Let's Stay Together - Al Green
5. Bustin' Surfboards - The Tornadoes
6. Lonesome Town - Ricky Nelson
7. Son Of A Preacher Man - Dusty Springfield
8. Zed's Dead, Baby (dialogue)/Bullwinkle Part II - The Centurians
9. Jack Rabbit Slim's Twist Contest (dialogue)/You Never Can Tell - Chuck Berry
10. Girl, You'll Be A Woman Soon - Urge Overkill
11. If Love Is A Red Dress (Hang Me In Rags) - Maria McKee
12. Bring Out the Gimp (dialogue)/Comanche - The Revels
13. Flowers On The Wall - The Statler Brothers
14. Personality Goes A Long Way (dialogue) - John Travolta and Samuel L. Jackson
15. Surf Rider - The Lively Ones
16. Ezekiel 25:17 (dialogue) - Samuel L. Jackson

As the immensely popular Soundtracks I Have Loved series comes to a close (take the rags away from your face...there are still two more after this one), I have occasionally found myself rifling through the Saved by the Bell trivia cluttering my brain to make sure I haven't forgotten anything. In doing so, I have recalled Soundtracks I Have Liked A Lot (Great Balls of Fire), Soundtracks I Have Liked Just Fine (A League of Their Own, Philadelphia, Honeymoon in Vegas), and Soundtracks On Which I Love Maybe One or Two Songs So I Bought Them Long After the Movie Was Released (to be visited in a future post).

But while making the transition from a CD rack (and random piles of CDs on my floor) to large, portable CD cases, I came across the soundtrack to Pulp Fiction, which reminds me an awful lot of my time at Ithaca College. And one unfortunate incident in Ithaca that occurred after my graduation.

I first saw Pulp Fiction in what I think was my only trip to the Ithaca College Student Activities Board weekend movies in Textor Hall. So I guess that would place it sometime in 1995, since the Textor movies were ones that had been out of the theater for awhile but were still relatively new (or The Rocky Horror Picture Show, which I have deftly avoided for my entire three-plus decades on Earth). And if it was the spring semester of 1995, I almost certainly attended alone, as that first year of college was not a very social one for me. The other three weren't exactly a giant party, either, but freshman year was a particularly antisocial affair. The upside of that was I spent a lot of nights discovering blues music other than The Blues Brothers at The Haunt downtown, so the year wasn't a total loss.

Anyway, enough about my social awkwardness (the name of my next blog) and back to the movie. I liked it, and I liked the music in it quite a bit, too. So, soon the soundtrack was purchased.

I think I was already into Dick Dale before I saw Pulp Fiction, though I'm not sure how (maybe through another movie soundtrack we will talk about soon), but I became a little obsessive after listening to "Misirlou." And it's one of the best soundtrack starters that I can think of. Good start to the movie, too.



I can generally do without soundtracks that include dialogue from the movie, but music is such an integral part of the movie that it makes sense on the Pulp Fiction soundtrack. Unfortunately, I forgot about the dialogue when I decided to play "Misirlou" on the jukebox at Ithaca's Bowl-O-Drome a few years ago. And, because I'm me, I wasn't there on a crowded night where no one's paying much attention to the music anyway. No, I was there in the afternoon. Bowling by myself. While a children's birthday party was under way. So, as soon as I heard Tim Roth's voice, I wanted to run out of the bowling alley. But I didn't. The guy at the front desk lowered the volume just about when Amanda Plummer said "pricks." But it was still loud enough. Sorry, impressionable young minds of Ithaca.

Of course, "Misirlou" isn't the only great song on the soundtrack, or the only great instrumental for that matter. Of the other instrumentals, "Bustin' Surfboards," "Bullwinkle Part II," and "Surf Rider" are fine, but "Comanche" takes the second-place prize.



As for the non-instrumentals, there are a bunch of gems, all of them better than the soundtrack's hit and only new track, "Girl, You'll Be A Woman Soon,", which isn't really a knock on that song, just the truth. I mean, unless someone does a particularly awesome version of "Porcupine Pie," a Neil Diamond cover will never be cooler than "Jungle Boogie," by Jersey City's own Kool & the Gang.



And you can't go wrong with Chuck Berry (unless you hire a crappy band to back him up, he doesn't get into the show, and you're left depressed as he stumbles through "Johnny B. Goode"...still can't shake the memory of that show).



"Let's Stay Together" and "Son of a Preacher Man" are similarly can't-miss additions to any soundtrack, and though I can do without "Lonesome Town" and I never really warmed up to "If Love Is a Red Dress (Hang Me in Rags)," they have their charms, too.

Easily the most pleasant surprise was courtesy of The Statler Brothers, whom I had previously dismissed as one of the worst things ever because my dad always watched them on The Nashville Network Saturday night, which meant I had no shot of watching anything I wanted to see on TV that night. Granted, aside from bowling and wrestling (which I liked too, so it was cool), this was pretty much the only hour of appointment TV my dad had all week (though if he happened upon a M*A*S*H or Hogan's Heroes rerun, good luck getting the remote control away from him). But that didn't make me any less angry. I was a bit of a snot at times.

So, when I saw the cursed Statler Brothers on the Pulp Fiction soundtrack, I was not pleased. Until I listened to the song.



"Playing solitaire 'til dawn/With a deck of 51?" How great a line is that? Who knew they sang cool songs? And here I thought they were all '80s sweaters and cornball patter. Sorry, Dad. You were right. Again. And, hey, why not check out more good Statlers songs here, here, here, and here. My dad would want you to.

And so ends another SIHL installment. The next one, our final full-album soundtrack piece, will be a marked contrast to Pulp Fiction. But I think it might be my all-time favorite soundtrack.

You're excited. I can tell.

Soundtracks I Have Loved: Cocktail

Soundtrack: Cocktail
Year Released: 1988
I Bought It On: Cassette
How Does It Hold Up?: No weak tracks, some ever so slightly dated.

Side 1
1. Wild Again--Starship
2. Powerful Stuff--The Fabulous Thunderbirds
3. Since When--Robbie Nevil
4. Don't Worry, Be Happy--Bobby McFerrin
5. Hippy Hippy Shake--The Georgia Satellites

Side 2
6. Kokomo--The Beach Boys
7. Rave On--John Mellencamp
8. All Shook Up--Ry Cooder
9. Oh, I Love You So--Preston Smith
10. Tutti Frutti--Little Richard

You would have a hard time convincing a sane, functional human being that Cocktail is a great movie. You could maybe, with the help of a few cocktails, make the case for it being a good movie in that odd 80s sort of way where it is of a time, and, really, it's not even close to being Tom Cruise's worst movie. Then again, there's this, which might be the World's Greatest Advertisement For Never Leaving Your House to Spend a Night in a Bar. Ever.



Yet, as difficult as it is to tout Cocktail's place among cinema's finest works, it is almost equally as easy to declare its soundtrack one of the all-time greats in the genre. Or at least it's easy to me. And this is my blog, so let's just assume that my opinion also belongs to every living person. It will make things simpler, and I'm pretty confident it's true anyway.



I couldn't possibly have seen Cocktail when it came out in 1988, as I was 11 and not regularly seeing R-rated movies at the time (though I think my first in a theater--the classic Carl Weathers/Vanity star vehicle Action Jackson--was around this time), and certainly not ones with Tom Cruise as a bartender. But because of the big radio and MTV hits, I was all in for the soundtrack. I actually wore out my cassette copy back in the day (see above) and, when I found a CD copy in the used bin for a couple of bucks recently, I gladly added it to my collection. As I listen to it as I write, I feel confident that it holds its place as one of my Top 5 all-time favorite soundtracks. Part of that can, of course, be credited to nostalgia, but part of it is legitimate, untainted affection. The soundtrack has a little bit of everything: new stuff by unknown artists, cover versions of old stuff (including Ry Cooder's "All Shook Up," playing in the background of the scene above...don't feel obligated to watch it again if you missed it the first time), new stuff by well-known artists, and even "Tutti Frutti," which is a can't-miss add-on.

The whole thing starts off with a Starship song, so it's an uphill climb from the get-go. If you don't want to listen to Starship, you can at least look at the scenes from the movie and think bad thoughts about Elisabeth Shue. Or Bryan Brown, if you prefer. Whatever floats your boat.



But the great thing about the Cocktail soundtrack is that for every cheesy 80s song, there is an excellent, good-in-any-decade song to counterbalance it, like the Georgia Satellites' cover of "Hippy Hippy Shake," which plays in the background of yet another homoerotic bottle-tossing scene:



"But Mr. Tinsel and Rot," you say, "doesn't this soundtrack also have 'Don't Worry Be Happy' and Kokomo,' two impossibly cheesy songs that I cannot defend on any level." First, please call me James; you sound stupid when you say "Mr. Tinsel and Rot." Second, if you want to pretend that you're too cool to have ever liked "Don't Worry, Be Happy" and "Kokomo," then (a) you're lying to yourself, and you really shouldn't do that, and (b) please leave.

Wait, wait, come back. OK, these songs have lost a little of their sheen. But let's just forget about that and embrace our childhoods, OK? And let's enjoy the still somewhat entertaining video for "Don't Worry, Be Happy" and the time the Beach Boys sang "Kokomo" on Full House while the Tanners bopped along.



And again, the '80sness of the soundtrack's two biggest hits is balanced by John Mellencamp's reasonably ambitious (if not as good as the original) cover of Buddy Holly's "Rave On", and maybe the Fabulous Thunderbirds' shining moment (I honestly think they're better than the average person gives them credit for), "Powerful Stuff."



Rounding things out are the oddly hypnotic "Oh, I Love You So" by Preston Smith and Robbie Nevil's "Since When," which is good, though not quite as good as his monster hit, "C'est La Vie". But, hey, that's life. And if you didn't see that sentence coming, you're probably still angry about me questioning the greatness of Cocktail.

If I only had the wit and soul of the writers who put words into the mouth of Brian Flanagan, I would now end this blog post with a classic barman poem to send you into fits of laughter and spasms of ecstasy. Alas, I am devoid of such skills. So I will just (must...resist...saying...raise a glass...) start the soundtrack playing again on my computer and enjoy the splendor of a classic album.

Cheers! (Dammit!)

Soundtracks I Have Loved: The Blues Brothers

Soundtrack: The Blues Brothers
Year Released: 1980
I Bought It On: Cassette
How Does It Hold Up?: Still not one clunker on the whole thing.

Side 1
1. She Caught The Katy
2. Peter Gunn Theme
3. Gimme Some Lovin'
4. Shake A Tail Feather
5. Everybody Needs Somebody To Love
6. The Old Landmark

Side 2
7. Think
8. Theme From Rawhide
9. Minnie The Moocher
10. Sweet Home Chicago
11. Jailhouse Rock

There are other soundtracks I've loved more, but none are as consistently great as the soundtrack to The Blues Brothers. I picked it up sometime toward the end of grammar school (didn't pick it up on the day it was released, because I was 3 and, hence, couldn't likely operate a cassette player), either right after seeing the movie for the first time or maybe even before (certainly before seeing the unedited version, which really sucks the power out of the scene where The Penguin smacks Jake and Elwood around). And it was right around the same time that I bought the Best of the Blues Brothers cassette featuring what quickly became my Absolute Favorite Number-One Song of All Time (Or At Least Until I Own More Than 20 Cassettes), "Rubber Biscuit."

I soon became obsessed with The Blues Brothers, thus adding one more item to the list of Things That Made the Teenage Girl of the Early 1990s Think I Was the Hottest Dude Ever. A lot of guys would have just stopped at putting on an uncomfortable amount of weight and being obsessed with professional wrestling, but I went a step further, declaring my favorite band was a cover band from a decade-old movie. It is this devotion to thoroughness that has served me well throughout my life.

Of course, calling the Blues Brothers a cover band is a little unfair, because, while they didn't do originals and, thus, easily fill the bill of being a cover band, the guys in the cover band--Steve Cropper and Donald "Duck" Dunn of Booker T and the MGs, Matt "Guitar" Murphy, "Blue" Lou Marini, Alan "Mr. Fabulous" Rubin, Tom "Bones" Malone, Willie "Too Big" Hall, and Murphy Dunne (replacing Paul Shaffer in the movie)--were pretty phenomenal. And therein lies the greatness of the Blues Brothers. If Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi have a mediocre band behind them, the whole thing falls flat. But the fact that they've got a top-flight group behind them elevates the project from a well-meaning goof to something worth hearing over 30 years later.

There's not a bad moment on the soundtrack (the closest are, I guess, the "Peter Gunn Theme," "She Caught the Katy," and "Jailhouse Rock," which would easily be the three best songs on any other soundtrack), so it's hard to single out the best moments. But, hey, let's try to at least get the top three in line. And let's go with Ray Charles first.



What? You prefer Aretha? OK. Get some dry white toast and four fried chickens and enjoy this little snippet, which cuts off the song but features all of the fantastic acting chops of Matt "Guitar" Murphy, criminally overlooked by the Academy in 1980.



And long before he played the last song Apollo Creed would ever hear, James Brown established his movie soundtrack cred with "The Old Landmark." It's one of the greatest music scenes in movie history. See the light.



And it's not just the guests that provide all the good stuff on the soundtrack (though I should also give props to Cab Calloway's "Minnie the Moocher"). The opening to the gig at the Palace Hotel Ballroom, "Everybody Needs Somebody To Love" (preceded by the non-soundtrack "I Can't Turn You Loose"), is probably the best of those (then again, the closer to the show was pretty good, too).



And, of course, for those denizens of Bob's Country Bunker (shame on you for not letting them finish "Gimme Some Lovin'"), here's your top jam (though you also dug this non-soundtrack number).



The Blues Brothers' legacy has taken some hits over the years (let us mention Blues Brothers 2000 here and never speak of it again), but the soundtrack still stands tall as one of the all-time best. And it led me--and likely many others--to gain a greater appreciation for and love of the blues (kudos also to the criminally soundtrack-less Adventures in Babysitting and Albert Collins for that). So, thanks, Jake, Elwood, and the boys. Your mission from God was a success.

Soundtracks I Have Loved: UHF

Soundtrack: UHF
Year Released: 1989
I Bought It On: Cassette, which I can't find, and I am not pleased about that
How Does It Hold Up?: Your question insults me

Track Listing

SIDE ONE
1. Money For Nothing/Beverly Hillbillies
2. Gandhi II
3. Attack of the Radioactive Hamsters From a Planet Near Mars
4. Isle Thing
5. The Hot Rocks Polka
6. UHF

SIDE TWO
7. Let Me Be Your Hog
8. She Drives Like Crazy
9. Generic Blues
10. Spatula City
11. Fun Zone
12. Spam
13. The Biggest Ball Of Twine In Minnesota

What more can be said about the genius of "Weird Al" Yankovic? Well, as it turns out, one more blog post's worth. And then there will be no more left to say. We will merely speak his name, perhaps listen to a song or two, and then nod knowingly.

But, first, this edition of Soundtracks I Have Loved, which will examine the genius of Mr. Yankovic through the prism of what may be his greatest achievement, the cinematic tour de force (I'm debating whether to change that to tour de farce...hmmm...nah, let's leave it) UHF and its companion soundtrack.

UHF, one of many excellent films featuring cinema's greatest little person actor, Billy Barty (see also Body Slam, which also starred Roddy Piper, Captain Lou Albano, and Charles Nelson Reilly...do you really have to ask if I have the soundtrack?), has lost very little of its charm over the years. I could, I suppose, see how the charm might not be for everyone, but, well, if you're one of those people, you've clearly stumbled upon the wrong blog. You may now leave.

For those who have stayed, here are the best five seconds of UHF--maybe the best five seconds in film history (sorry, Asian people).



Or perhaps you prefer "Wheel of Fish":



Maybe you're a "Spatula City" fan:



What I'm getting at is that you're bound to find something to laugh at in UHF. And if you don't, well, hey, good for you. Enjoy your life of dullness and snobbery. Jerk.

Only the last of three clips above (along with "Gandhi II"..."no more Mr. Passive Resistance") is on the soundtrack, which features both songs included in the movie and some other stuff floating around Mr. Yankovic's sainted head at the time, both parodies and otherwise. Of the otherwise, I had a particular fondness for the big finale of "Generic Blues" ("Maybe I'll blow my brains out mama, or maybe I'll just go bowling instead) and the ridiculousness and bombast of "The Biggest Ball of Twine in Minnesota", which I can only hope will be the next kids' book he writes (here's the first one). I was less pumped up about "Attack of the Radioactive Hamsters From a Planet Near Mars" and the title song. But the latter grew on me. And the video's excellent.



Oddly enough, the parodies on the soundtrack aren't among Mr. Yankovic's finest ("She Drives Like Crazy" is particularly weak, but, then again, maybe I just hate the original), though "Isle Thing" has its moments and fits the soundtrack theme well, as does "Money for Nothing/Beverly Hillbillies," which gets bonus points for having Mark Knopfler actually playing on it (thus enabling his guitar work on the song to be more easily heard in Canada.

But the soundtrack's best parody is easily "Spam." Weird Al and food are almost always a home run.



"Spam," however, is not the reason why I loved the soundtrack to UHF (nor is the 17-second "Let Me Be Your Hog" or the theme to Stanley Spadowski's Clubhouse, "Fun Zone", though I have no quarrel with either). No, the song most likely to make me rewind my cassette over and over again was the unbelievably awesome "Hot Rocks Polka" not only one of my favorite Weird Al songs, but also one of my favorite polkas. And that's me saying it, so take heed.



I could listen to that every day and not grow tired of it. In fact, I might start doing that. Hooray...a new goal in life!

And so ends this SIHL installment and my praise of our greatest parodist (and fantastic live performer...honest...go see him and you'll agree) "Weird Al" Yankovic. Actually, to be honest, my praise will never stop. I lied at the beginning of the post.

Supplies!

Soundtracks I Have Loved: Good Morning, Vietnam

Soundtrack: Good Morning, Vietnam
Year Released: 1988
I Bought It On: Cassette
How Does It Hold Up?: Unsurprisingly, just fine, though I don't think Robin Williams is as funny as I once thought he was.

SIDE ONE
1. Adrian Cronauer
2. Nowhere to Run--Martha Reeves and the Vandellas
3. I Get Around--The Beach Boys
4. Game of Love--Wayne Fontana and the Mindbenders
5. Adrian Cronauer
6. Sugar and Spice--The Searchers
7. Liar, Liar--The Castaways
8. The Warmth of the Sun--The Beach Boys

SIDE TWO
9. Adrian Cronauer
10. I Got You (I Feel Good)--James Brown
11. Baby Please Don't Go--Them
12. Adrian Cronauer
13. Danger Hearbreak Dead Ahead--Marvelettes
14. Five O'Clock World--The Vogues
15. California Sun--The Rivieras
16. Adrian Cronauer
17. What a Wonderful World--Louis Armstrong

Up to this point, the soundtracks featured in the globally beloved SIHL series have primarily featured songs either written expressly for a movie or songs pretty much unknown before appearing on said soundtrack. But there's another type of soundtrack I have loved: the one that takes a whole bunch of old recordings of already popular songs and jams them all together in a package easily digestible for a preteen desperately trying to stave off boredom and scouring through the puny cassette selection of a run-down music store in Catskill, NY, in a late-1980s summer.

I am speaking, of course, of the soundtrack to Good Morning, Vietnam, another R-rated movie that I'm not entirely certain I saw in the theaters. I tend to think I didn't, but that would probably mean I bought the soundtrack before seeing the movie, which would've been odd but not entirely out of the realm of possibility. What I do recall is that my dad pre-ordered the VHS version at an upstate Ames, perhaps in the same plaza where we saw Dragnet, but more likely at the Ames in Greenville, NY, which was just up the road from the coolest place ever, Vince-Anna's Pizza-Putt, a place of dreams that combined pizza and miniature golf into one glorious facility. They've since removed the mini golf, which makes me sad, but the same family still runs the place, so do stop in sometime. So, I might have seen it for the first time on that very VHS, long after the soundtrack had become part of my regular listening in the summer of 1988.

The soundtrack includes some of Robin Williams's finer moments from the movie, most of which probably went directly over my naive little head at the time, or at least didn't completely register, partly because some of the jokes were "adult" and partly because my knowledge of Vietnam at the time was probably pretty tiny. For instance, I doubt that a "soldier" stating his location as being in "Poontang" really made any comedic sense to me on any level, though I probably just laughed because it's a funny word. But the parts I understood were funny enough, so I dug 'em, though it was really the songs I was more interested in.

I'd certainly heard a few ("I Get Around" and "I Got You [I Feel Good]" for sure, and maybe "Nowhere to Run" and "What A Wonderful World," too) via CBS-FM on car rides back and forth to upstate, but most of the songs were new to me at the time. Some took a little while to register ("Sugar and Spice" and "Liar Liar" in particular), and I've still never fully, ahem, warmed up to "The Warmth of the Sun", but, mainly because it was way too much of a hassle to rewind and fast-forward through the clunkers, I stuck it out and eventually came to love just about every song, to varying degrees.

I liked (and continue to like) the aforementioned tunes, as well as "Baby Please Don't Go" and "Danger Heartbreak Dead Ahead" well enough, but they were firmly in the second tier of my favorites. "Game of Love" was probably the first song on the soundtrack that really grabbed me, and I've grown no less fond of it over the years. And, since I would have no clue what Wayne Fontana and/or any of the Mindbenders looked like (or sounded like live) without the wonders of YouTube, I tip my cap to you, fair Internet.



And, long before The Drew Carey Show brought "Five O'Clock World" into the greater public consciousness, I was already well versed thanks to the soundtrack. And, really, what other song speaks to an 11-year-old more than a bouncy lament to the rigors of the working world? Between this and "Workin' for a Livin'," I was well on my way to developing a strong, yet ultimately peppy hate for The Man (come to think of it, I also dug Roy Orbison's "Workin' for the Man" around this time, too).



On a side note, isn't it time to bring Hullabaloo back?

The hands-down number-one-favorite hit of the soundtrack for me was easily the Rivieras' "California Sun" (a celestial body I wouldn't see for another 20 years from the time of the soundtrack's purchase). Actually, if I am to believe IMDB, I had already been exposed to Frankie Avalon's cover of the song the previous year (we'll be delving into that in a future SIHL post), but, and please forgive me, Mr. Avalon (and you too, Ramones), there's no version better than the original.



I just about wore the cassette out in the summer of 1988, playing it on my little boom box in my bedroom on many a summer day in Windham, NY. Luckily, I didn't totally wear it out, so I can still pop it into the last remaining portable cassette player and head back to that summer, and the summers of the 1960s that I missed, whenever I want.

Soundtracks I Have Loved: La Bamba

Soundtrack: La Bamba
Year Released: 1987
I Bought It On: Cassette
How Does It Hold Up?: As well as the originals

1. La Bamba - Los Lobos
2. Come On, Let's Go - Los Lobos
3. Ooh! My Head - Los Lobos
4. We Belong Together - Los Lobos
5. Framed - Los Lobos
6. Donna - Los Lobos
7. Lonely Teardrops - Howard Huntsberry
8. Crying, Waiting, Hoping - Marshall Crenshaw
9. Summertime Blues - Brian Setzer
10. Who Do You Love? - Bo Diddley
11. Charlena - Los Lobos
12. Goodnight My Love - Los Lobos

I suppose it was the hours spent listening to CBS-FM in the car that made me want to see "La Bamba" so bad in the summer of 1987, because I can't really think of any other reason why a 10-year-old would be itching to see the life story of a musician who had died 28 years later. And though I can't recall who took me to see the movie, I'm pretty sure I saw it in the theater that summer--and bought the soundtrack soon after. I actually bought the 45 of "La Bamba"/"Charlena" first, probably after seeing the video on MTV. I actually forgot the gratuitous Lou Diamond Phillips appearance until now. It's also interesting to note that Cesar Rosas of Los Lobos hasn't really done all that much in the aging department; the other wolves have not fared as well.



However I got to "La Bamba"--the movie and the soundtrack--I'm glad I did, because I loved them both. And I still do. The movie's inexplicably underrated, and if Tinsel and Rot Hall of Famer Gary Busey can get nominated for an Oscar for "The Buddy Holly Story," then surely both Lou Diamond Phillips and Esai Morales should've gotten recognition for their work in the movie. Morales is particularly great as brother Bob. Some people may have left that movie with a fear of flying, but I left with a fear of Bob. I distinctly remember being scared out of my mind by him when I saw the movie the first time. In fact, I'm still a little scared when I see some scenes, and I think Bob may have steered me toward a life of sobriety. And I'm also in no rush to go to Tijuana. (By the way, if you ever want to see "La Bamba" with only Bob's scenes, YouTube's got you covered.)

Of course, when your movie's about music, the soundtrack is just as important as the movie itself. And "La Bamba" comes through, largely--but not entirely--on the strength of Los Lobos's eight songs on the soundtrack (and that's not counting "Rip It Up" and "Oh Boy," which didn't make the soundtrack but were in the movie...I'm not sure who had the honor of providing Bob's drum work). There's probably never been a band so perfect to do a movie's soundtrack, so everything sounds pretty good (though, to be honest, I would often fast-forward past "Charlena" and Goodnight My Love" on my cassette to get back to the more rockin' Side 1). But the best of the best is, well, shoot, I can't pick one. Let's call it a tie among "Come On, Let's Go," "Ooh! My Head," and "Framed."





But it's not just Los Lobos that makes the soundtrack. You can never go wrong with Bo Diddley, and the other three on Side 2 are equally impressive. Howard Huntsberry, who to the best of my Googling only found additional success essentially reprising his role on the soundtrack to "Ghostbusters II", has Jackie Wilson down pretty well on "Lonely Teardops."



Marshall Crenshaw does a similarly good job with both the sound and look of Buddy Holly on "Crying, Waiting, Hoping," which is playing as Ritchie makes that last call home before the plane leaves Iowa.



And Brian Setzer, well before he became The Annoying and Ubiquitous Brian Setzer, nails "Summertime Blues."



Of course, the soundtrack should've ended with Santo and Johnny's "Sleepwalk," but I guess that would've ruined the concept of newer artists doing versions of the older songs. But there's probably no song that makes me think more of "La Bamba" than "Sleepwalk." And if you don't well up when Ritchie's mom screams "Not my Ritchie!" and Bob yells out his brother's name at the end of the movie, you're a heartless douchebag.



So, here's to "La Bamba," the movie and the soundtrack. And here's to Ritchie Valens, who it's hard to imagine never made it past 17 and still put out some unforgettable music. I think he's got Bieber beat.

Soundtracks I Have Loved: Rocky IV

Soundtrack: Rocky IV
Year Released: 1985
I Bought It On: Vinyl
How Does It Hold Up?: Like our great American flag, strong and proud

Track List:

1. Burning Heart--Survivor
2. Heart's on Fire--John Cafferty
3. Double or Nothing--Kenny Loggins and Gladys Knight
4. Eye of the Tiger--Survivor
5. War--Vince DiCola
6. Living in America--James Brown
7. No Easy Way Out--Robert Tepper
8. One Way Street--Go West
9. The Sweetest Victory--Touch
10.Training Montage--Vince DiCola

I'm not sure I've fully recovered from the death of Apollo Creed.

In the months leading up to the release of Rocky IV, I'm sure it must've been revealed that Apollo was going to meet his maker and that he was going to be sent on his way by the evil Russian Ivan Drago. And I know I collected the Rocky IV trading cards, which were probably released before or around the same time the movie was. So it seems reasonable to say I knew it was coming.

But it still hurt.

And so, I never wanted Rocky to win the big fight more than I did in Rocky IV. Nikolai Volkoff, with his quaint singing of the Soviet national anthem, was surely hated by Young Me, but he hadn't killed Hulk Hogan. Drago not only killed Apollo but he seemed OK with it, even sort of pleased. Douchebag.



But at least (SPOILER ALERT) Rocky showed him at the end. And almost ended the Cold War in the process. What a guy.



And the song playing as Rocky's Speech for World Peace ends (John Cafferty's "Heart's on Fire") is but one of the many gems on the movie's soundtrack, one of the three Rocky soundtracks I've owned in my life (the original, IV, and V...yes I bought the soundtrack to Rocky V; maybe we'll discuss that another time). It was also among the first albums I owned, and I still have my original vinyl (no skips).

The soundtrack definitely aims to please, or pander, depending on your degree of cynicism, which, if you've seen and enjoyed Rocky IV is likely pretty low. Not only does it include previous soundtrack hero Cafferty (this time without the Beaver Brown Band, or at least they're not credited), but it also turns to King of the Soundtracks Kenny Loggins for a duet with Gladys Knight. Unfortunately, the song's terrible, proving that, as hard as this may be to believe, even Kenny Loggins sucks sometimes.

Survivor, on a soundtrack roll of their own with "Eye of the Tiger" and "The Moment of Truth" from The Karate Kid, make their bid for Logginsian greatness with the leadoff track, "Burning Heart." It's a solid tune, though not enough to send them into the soundtrack stratosphere (it is, as best I can tell, their last soundtrack hit, though I suppose there's still time). I'm not sure if "Deep in our soul/A quiet ember/Knows it's you against you/It's the paradox/That drives you on" is brilliant or garbage, but most people have the same debate about the Rocky movies, so the song fits fine.



"Eye of the Tiger" also makes a return appearance from the Rocky III soundtrack, which would be completely stupid and unnecessary except for the fact that everything is made better with the inclusion of "Eye of the Tiger." Don't believe me? Ask Paul Anka. Or check out Staten Island's own PS 22 Chorus.

Side 2 of the soundtrack almost derails the awesomeness, but the two clunkers from Go West (better soundtrack days awaited) and Touch (no clue who they are, and the song's so bad, I don't feel like Googling them or finding you a YouTube link) are easily floored by the one-two punch (see what I did there?) of James Brown's "Living in America" and Robert Tepper's "No Easy Way Out." The former, which, of course, precedes Apollo's untimely demise in the movie, is best enjoyed on the album cut, where Brown throws in an "Eddie Murphy, eat your heart out" toward the end. But I feel like it wouldn't be right to not put in the clip from the movie. I think every boxing match should start like this.



Robert Tepper's contribution, though less celebrated, is no less impressive. Plus, if Wikipedia is to be believed, he's from Bayonne. North Jersey, represent!



And, then, of course, there are the training montages. You can debate the overall merit of Rocky IV, but I don't think you can deny the greatness of the movie's training montages. Vince DiCola (whose "War"--definitely not Edwin Starr's song--is in the big fight scene) lucks into giving the incredibly '80s background music for one of them (the other, decidedly more awesome one features "Heart's on Fire") and cleverly titles the resulting song "Training Montage."



Eat it, Communist pigs! Not only did your lifeless, Apollo Creed-killing robot not break the great, dogsled-pulling Rocky Balboa, but you also, to the best of my knowledge, never produced a soundtrack as cool as the one to Rocky IV.

U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!

Soundtracks I Have Loved: Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol

Soundtrack: Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol
Year Released: 1987
I Bought It On: Cassette
How Does It Hold Up?: As well as the movie, which you can interpret any way you wish

Track List:

1. Rock the House--Darryl Duncan
2. It's Time to Move--S.O.S. Band
3. Dancin' Up a Storm--Stacy Lattisaw
4. Let's Go to Heaven in My Car--Brian Wilson
5. The High Flyer (Police Academy Theme-Montage)--Robert Folk
6. Citizens on Patrol--Michael Winslow and the L.A. Dream Team
7. Rescue Me--Family Dream
8. I Like My Body--Chico DeBarge
9. Winning Streak--Garry Glenn
10.Shoot for the Top--Southern Pacific

The Police Academy films aren't exactly well loved in the world outside my apartment. I understand and begrudgingly accept that. They're not particularly well written, the acting is a little lacking, the storylines (such as they are) are pretty asinine, and the jokes are, for the most part, pretty lame.

But other than that, the films are really quite good.

OK, maybe they don't hold up as well as they did when I was in my pre-teens, but in that time period they were right in my cinematic sweet spot. I honestly didn't care much for the original (I think I fell asleep while watching it on video, and I can't say with any confidence that I've ever seen the whole thing), but I was hooked with Police Academy 2: Their First Assignment, in which I was introduced to the genius that is Bobcat Goldthwait as Zed. I remember being disappointed by Police Academy 3: Back in Training, probably because the anticipation was so high after the second chapter. But then when I saw the full-color ad in the Sunday comics for Police Academy 4: Citizens in Patrol, I became giddy with excitement again. I cut out the ad, taped it on my wall, and prepared for the funny (please note that I now own the movie poster, and it's signed by Steve Guttenberg, Leslie Easterbrook, and Michael Winslow...yes, I'm bragging). This was going to be the first Police Academy movie I would see in the theater, and I was pumped.

I was not disappointed. The bad taste left from Police Academy 3 was quickly washed away in the opening scene, and by the time the movie ended I was back on board with the franchise. Police Academy 5: Assignment: Miami Beach was strong, too, but Police Academy 6: City Under Siege was a mess, and I haven't even bothered to see Mission to Moscow, so I feel comfortable in declaring that Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol was the crest of the Police Academy wave.

It's the last Mahoney movie, as Guttenberg seemingly figured that once Three Men and a Baby hit, his career was ready to take off and he could leave the franchise behind. Both he and the franchise suffered for it, but this film is a strong goodbye, for both he and Goldthwait (plus The Gutt got Sharon Stone as his love interest, so that was nice). And the film's also got the 23-year-old David Spade and 31-year-old Brian "Ratner" Backer deftly playing young skate punks, complemented off the boards by Tab Thacker (who I just discovered died three years ago, which makes me a little sad) as the aptly named House.

Here's the best nine minutes from the movie. Do with that statement what you will.



We could sit here and debate if the fourth installment or the second is the best all day (and I know you want me to), but let me move into the point of this blog and tell you that I only own the soundtrack to one Police Academy movie and that's Police Academy 4. It's easily the musically strongest (then again, I don't even remember music from any of the other movies, other than the "Blue Oyster Theme," so they might not even have soundtracks).

The soundtrack gets off to a terrible start, though. It starts so poorly that I'm willing to posit the theory that Motown (yes, Motown put this out) got the sides mixed up and Side 1 should really be Side 2. How else to explain that the seemingly interminable "Rock the House" leads off the album, while this undeniable gem is the leadoff track on Side 2?



Seriously. Buried on Side 2. Unbelievable. That's a leadoff soundtrack tune if ever there was one. Michael Winslow was robbed, along with the L.A. Dream Team (props also to Mike Stuart and Arthur Funaro, who are listed as the song's writers).

This theory is wrecked only by the inclusion of Brian Wilson's excellent "Let's Go to Heaven in My Car" in the four hole on Side 1. Yes, that Brian Wilson. Maybe Eugene Landy saw the big career and credibility boost McCartney got from doing "Spies Like Us" and urged Wilson to get in on that action. In yet another instance where the Internet pulls up lame, there isn't a clip of this song on YouTube. I blame Mike Love. Anyway, you can hear a tiny piece of it in the background starting at 6:05 of this clip.

"Rescue Me" is the top clunker on Side 2, but things pick up after that. Chico DeBarge's "I Like My Body" is so terrible it's endearing, but the cyberspace Chico DeBarge fan club hasn't put that on YouTube either, so you'll again have to settle for hearing it briefly in the background of a scene. But at least it gives me an excuse to post a link to a Blue Oyster scene. "Winning Streak" (this isn't the soundtrack cut, but it'll do) is so of the '80s that its power cannot be denied, and the album closer, Southern Pacific's "Shoot for the Top," is a song I still sing in my head whenever I see a bunch of skateboarders. And, from what I gather, the scene in the film that makes me do that is a big hit with the skater kids, mainly because it features a young Tony Hawk, along with a bunch of other famous skaters who don't have their own video games or clothing lines. Here's the song, sans skateboarders (enjoy the clip from the movie--in French--here).



And, to prove that it isn't just John Hughes movies that leave key songs off soundtracks, whither The Blow Monkeys' "It Doesn't Have to Be That Way," which is playing when Zed and his love Laura (Corinne Bohrer) run into each other's arms? It could have easily taken the place of "It's Time to Move," "Dancin' Up a Storm," or "Rescue Me."



In retrospect, the soundtrack, like the movie, probably isn't as good as I once thought it was. But with a solid Brian Wilson cut, some classic examples of "the '80s sound," and the perennially, undeniably awesome title cut, it's still better than it has any right to be. And I have no problem declaring my love for it in 2010.

So there.

Soundtracks I Have Loved: The Great Outdoors

Soundtrack: The Great Outdoors
Year Released: 1988
I Bought It On: Cassette
Do I Still Own It?: Yep. [Question now discontinued, because I realize now that I still have all of these]
How Does It Hold Up?: Eh, not too bad

Track List:

1. Land of a Thousand Dances (Part 1)--Elwood Blues Revue featuring Wilson Pickett
2. Hot Fun in the Summertime--Elwood Blues Revue featuring Sam Moore
3. Big Country--Joe Walsh
4. Cabin Fever--David Wilcox
5. Land of a Thousand Dances (Part 2)--Elwood Blues Revue featuring Wilson Pickett
6. Big Bear--Bomb the Bass
7. Beaver Patrol--Pop Will Eat Itself
8. Dragboat--Elwood Blues/Tom Scott
9. Hot Weasel--Elwood Blues/Peter Aykroyd
10. Hey, Cowboy!--Thomas Newman and the Lazy 13

As you may have gathered from this series and other posts here, I'm probably not the guy you want to ask for a movie recommendation. When it comes to movies, I'm what is generally referred to as a moron. I don't have much use for dramas. Action movies aren't really my bag. If a movie is widely considered a classic, chances are I haven't seen it.

But a movie with Dan Aykroyd and John Candy, written and produced by John Hughes, well, now we're talking.



So it was with great joy that, in the summer of 1988, I set out to see The Great Outdoors. I was not disappointed. In fact, I tend to think I saw it twice that summer, but my memory refuses to yield 100% confirmation. At the very least, I saw it at the Orpheum in Tannersville, NY, while on summer vacation. I recall my mother thinking it wasn't very funny, but she eventually came around after a viewing a few months later on VHS. She was, and likely still is, a big fan of the jet-ski scene. How could you not be? And how could that not be one of the scenes someone uploaded to YouTube. C'mon, nerds, get to work. I'd do it, but I've gotta write these blog entries that no one reads.

At least someone had the good sense to record the Old 96er scene off the television.



My other non-soundtrack memory of The Great Outdoors is from eighth grade. Because I was such a good egg (and the Staten Island Catholic School Spelling Bee Champion that year, thank you very much), our teacher, Mrs. Scalegnio, trusted me enough to let me pick the movie we watched as our end-of-the-year treat. Because I went to a Catholic school, most of the movies we were allowed to watch were innocuous movies that contained nothing that could possibly offend the Young Catholic Mind. I can recall screenings of The Neverending Story, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (which I was sick for), and The Trouble With Angels, which I think is the one where we decided we'd had enough and wanted to pick the movie next time.

So, I came up with a few choices (I can't remember what else I came up with, but I'm pretty sure one was Walk Like A Man, which, though I haven't seen it in 20 years and can't remember much about it, I can't possibly defend), running through the movies in my head and trying to make sure there were no objectionable parts. I think the class decided on The Great Outdoors, and I was likely pleased with that outcome. I couldn't recall anything offensive, and since it was rated PG, I figured I was safe.

Then the movie started, and I was reminded of some objectionable--or at least objectionable to an eighth-grade teacher--scenes I'd forgotten about. Like the one where Chet Ripley--John Candy's character--is taking his wife's bra off. And the occasional salty language, like when Roman Craig (Dan Aykroyd) tells Chet that hot dogs are made of "lips and assholes" or when he heads to the bathroom by way of saying, "Time to introduce Mr. Thick Dick to Mr. Urinal Cake" (the latter of which is now one of my favorite movie lines but apparently went right over my head back then). And then there's the scene where Mrs. Ripley and Mrs. Craig (played by Annette Bening, in the only movie I've ever seen her in) talk about how the latter occasionally has to find, ahem, gratification by sitting on the washing machine.

I think Mrs. Scalegnio turned red a few times.

As these scenes began and I realized what I had forgotten about, I would start coughing uncontrollably to cover up the offending dialogue. I don't think I was very successful, and sometimes I could only keep the coughing charade going for so long. Whatever. At least we saw one decent movie in eight years.

Enough of that. Let's move on to the soundtrack, which has helpfully been uploaded by YouTube user SoundRarity (who has also uploaded the Twins soundtrack, which somehow escaped my purview and includes 2 Live Crew's painful cover of "Yakety Yak" [the original, by the way, opens The Great Outdoors but doesn't make it to the soundtrack]), so you can enjoy it in all its glory.

And there is indeed some glory here, though some shine brighter than others. The usually reliable Joe Walsh isn't so hot on "Big Country," which Wikipedia tells me was the original title of the movie, and Thomas Newman (him again?) probably could've trimmed a minute from "Hey Cowboy!". But those are the worst of the bunch.

I don't think I need to hear David Wilcox's "Cabin Fever" more than once a decade, but it aint a bad song. And Pop Will Eat Itself's "Beaver Patrol" is not without its charm. But the contributions of Wilson Pickett and Sam Moore carry the soundtrack. Granted, I'm not entirely sure why there needed to be two versions of Pickett singing "Land of a Thousand Dances," but, really, can you ever have too many? And the 11-year-old me was probably pretty excited to hear another version of the song after the epic cover by the WWF's finest on The Wrestling Album. Hard to top that one, but Pickett tries his best to reclaim the tune. Good video, too, featuring Dan Aykroyd's return to choreographed music video dancing.



And, as for Moore, I think the soundtrack's version of "Hot Fun in the Summertime" (not sure who's doing the rest of the vocals, because no one's credited) is better than the original. Sorry, Sly.



I suppose it would be cooler if I said one of these two songs was my favorite on the album, but we should all know by now that cool passed me by a long time ago. So I will gladly admit that my favorite song on the soundtrack is "Big Bear" by Bomb The Bass. To be fair, though, Annette Bening makes the song (she utters the titular phrase).



And in case you wanted the scene from the movie (another classic), here's a snippet:



And so ends my salute to the soundtracks of John Hughes Movies No One Ever Really Talks About. The next installment of SIHL (and most remaining installments, I think) will stay in the 1980s, though, so be prepared for more nostalgic reminiscences of when I actually went to the movies.

Until then, keep an eye on Reg for your Storm Tracker updates.